burnt computerAfter working in the Internet / IT industry for several years I have come across my share of people that should not be allowed to touch a computer. I could not find a test that would test the knowledge of an average person to determine if they were worthy or not to use a computer.

Here are twenty one questions to test your computer literacy. Answer carefully, you are being graded.

Question Yes No
1. Do you proclaim, out loud, your three year old knows more about computers than you do? ____ ____
2. Are you still looking for the “Any Key”? ____ ____
3. Do you really think you win something for being the 421,232th visitor? ____ ____
4. Is your only solution to call the family “computer geek”? ____ ____
5. Do you call the thing above the 8 a snowflake? ____ ____
6. Is Netscape 4.7 your default browser? ____ ____
7. Do you belive that the Firefox people are talking about is the 1982 movie about a really cool jet? ____ ____
8. Do the blinking ads compell you to click? ____ ____
9. Are your passwords on a sticky note on your monitor? ____ ____
10. Do you ignore those messages that tell your anti-virus subscription has expired? ____ ____
11. Is your home network’s name “linksys”? ____ ____
12. Do you not believe in a firewall? ____ ____
13. Have you paid for any Geek Squad services? ____ ____
14. Do you anxiously open every attachment in your email? ____ ____
15. When someone is explaining something technical, do you dismiss it as “computer talk”? ____ ____
16. Do you think you can get a free iPod for filling out your zip code? ____ ____
17. Do you believe the IT people have magical powers? ____ ____
18. Do you have a collection of AOL discs? ____ ____
19. Have you hit your monitor when your computer gave an error? ____ ____
20. Do you still the think the Internet is a fad? ____ ____
21. When someone asks what’s wrong with your computer, do you respond with, “It’s running slow”? ____ ____

Well, did you do? If you answered “Yes” to any of the questions, then you fail. You probably already give the IT folks migraines and it would be best if you stepped away from the computer. Oh yeah, they already make fun of you. You are referred to as a SEU - Stupid End User. When you call them with a problem they laugh and tell the other IT people that you have another Eye-Dee-Ten-Tee error (figure it out). The only thing you are good for is clicking on ads. There may be hope for you yet.

If you answered “No” to all the questions, then you had a good laugh and sympathized with IT people around the world. Thank you for not being one of them.

I’m sure there are some questions that need to be added. Let me know, and I will add them to the list.

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21 Responses to “21 Questions to Determine If You Are a Stupid Computer User”

  1. Ilze Says:

    hey! the IT guys at my company really do have magic powers!

  2. kaediem Says:

    How about…

    Has an IT person ever turned on/plugged in your computer and solved your problem?

    It never does it when you’re looking is something you’ve said to someone before about your computer problem

    You think spam is lunch meat

  3. maw Says:

    Do you call that box thingy the hard drive?

  4. MyName Says:

    You missed the most obvious…

    Do you, or have you ever used your computer’s “Cup Holder”?

    Do you put your email address in every web form you come across?

  5. kaediem Says:

    When you get an email that promises that something strange will happen on your screen if you forward it to 500 people you believe it.

  6. My Stuff Blog » Blog Archive » Are You A Stupid Computer User?Blog, Blogging About My Stuff Blog, My Stuff Blog Center Says:

    [...] 21 Questions-to Determine If You Are a Stupid Computer User [...]

  7. Nnamdi Says:

    Here’s one
    Do you pour water on your computer when it is hot to cool it down?

    Some SEU did it

  8. news.osn.ro Says:

    Profil de utilizator computer…

    Unor utilizatori de computere ar trebui sa li se interzica accesul la acestea dupa efectuarea acestui test cu 21 de intrebari prin care se poate afla ce fel de utilizatori sunt….

  9. Ilze Says:

    what about the blonde that uses white-out to fix her mistakes on the screen…

  10. 21 Questions to Find Out if You (or Someone You Know) is a Stupid Computer User Says:

    [...] Read More [...]

  11. mercutiom Says:

    As an IT myself, I take issue with 19. There have been many times that I have hit the monitor due to the frustration over receiving an error.

  12. ?? » 21 ?????????? Says:

    [...] ?? | ?? Tag: Hardware [...]

  13. Cool Websites and Tips (makeuseof extra #57) » MakeUseOf.com Says:

    [...] 21 Questions to determine if You Are a Stupid computer user [jasonbartholme.com] [...]

  14. pooryoric Says:

    Better to hit the monitor than the box thingy/hard drive.

  15. Jess Says:

    I too have hit and even thrown equipment around the room when it doesn’t work. Sometimes they even behave after I have done so. And AOL Discs make great targets for my guns.

  16. Link Love (4) | Alive Says:

    [...] Bartholme asked 21 Questions to determine if you are a stupid computer user. I don’t know about you, but I know some people who probably answer yes to all the [...]

  17. Ami Says:

    I’ve definitely hit my computer a couple of times (working on something completely normal one minute; the next: BLUE SCREEN OF DEATH!!!)

    Are you unsure of what a desktop, mouse, monitor, or keyboard is?

    No joke; I told a girl once to save something to her desktop, and she asked me “What’s the desktop?”

  18. room34.com | Room 34 Multimedia » Version SNAFU Says:

    [...] (1/1/2008): File under SEU. I think the problem was simply that I needed to clear my cache. The first suspicion was aroused [...]

  19. Bill Says:

    IT: Please goto your C Drive

    Customer: Whats a C Drive?

  20. Phil in Abbeville Says:

    I read somewhere that the average computer user is dumb as a brick.
    I worked part-time at Office Depot for a few months several years back and met several “Bricks”.
    I like the people that will tap their mouse on the desk thinking it speeds things up.

  21. _*intoxicate_d me.// Says:

    [...] 21 Questions To Determine Whether You Are A Stupid User [...]

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